Just when you think nothing can top murder mysteries and tantric sex therapy sessions, DJ Pauly D pulled off the biggest surprise of them all on the last night of the latest family vacation.
Tonight’s Jersey Shore: Family Vacation season finale kicked off with “the dumbest race” in the history of guido sports — guidos running in swim fins, you can imagine the rest — and culminated with the arrival of one rather shocking note on Mike’s doorstep. No, not that note… more on that one later.
Turns out that Pauly (who conveniently peaced out early) took it upon himself to book fun activity lie detector tests for the gang’s last night in the Banana Republic Florida Keys. Naturally, Mike (and his positive vibes) was determined to “execute this just right.” Cue Lauren: “How do you put a positive spin on a lie detector?”
The trick: soften the news with food. “Listen, if you ever want to surprise anybody, textbook, is to make sure they’re fed first to soften the blow a little bit,” Mike shared. “Anybody on an empty stomach, they’re gonna flip out for sure.”
But just in case chairs were flipped and bottles of booze were grabbed (just kidding, Snooki’s wine was still MIA at that point), the Sorrentino family’s bags were packed for a potential quick exit.
Clearly, the fettucini went over well (though it’s no bruschetta!) because everyone took a turn in the hot seat. After the questions started rolling in, well, let’s just say that we learned a lot about our Jersey Shore friends. For starters, Mike is all about the upper body lifts and his fade isn’t exactly au naturel. He and Vinny share similar, um, backdoor grooming habits, and we got to know Deena’s and JWOWW’s other halves (and their sexcapades) really well. Deena admitted that she hates that infamous bikini scene, and finally (finally!), more was revealed about the note that won’t die — yes, Angelina did play a part in writing it. You’re welcome.
One of the biggest shockers came from Nicole, who came clean and confessed that she “overreacted” at Angelina’s wedding (“but only because she did”). AND when asked if Sammi Sweetheart made “a mistake not coming back,” she replied, “Um, I don’t want her back, no.”
While it was “inconclusive” as to whether or not Angelina and Vinny ever had crushes on one another, Ang and Chris appeared to make some solid headway in their relationship. But it was revealed in a later flash-forward that Angelina “filed for divorce already,” which had “been a long time coming.”
In the end, no lies were detected. Oh, and Nicole found her wine. (Enrique, you’re off the hook.)
Your thoughts on the crew’s lie detector tests (and their answers)? Tell us in the comments, then stay with MTV News for all things Jersey Shore: Family Vacation.
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